TODAY my 1st heartbeat, my oldest child turns 21 πŸ™ŒπŸ˜’πŸ€”πŸ˜’πŸ’₯! WOW! I have went through every emotion you can imagine as this day gets closer!  As I sit here, I think about all that WE have been through these 21 years and how we grew up together! I was just a baby myself when I had you, I was 17, just a Junior in HS! I was young scared of having a baby and most definitely scared of my mama! My teenage life as I knew it was over! No more basketball, no more hanging out, no more fighting acting a fool, no more allowance, I had to get a JOB! And you know moms was opposed to me getting on public aid, so I had to do what I had to do! But let me tell you how God already worked it out for us! Ms Delphia baby sat for me while I went to school and moms had me take 7 credits a year..so I was in a position to graduate in December 96, in only 3 1/2 years; which I did! Look at God! πŸ™Œ 

When I had you, I knew you were mines and my responsibility! If you couldn’t go, I couldn’t go! I learned that pretty quick! Meaning moms wasn’t watching you so I can go hang out, only when I went to work! You were over a year old when I walked across the stage! Your mama refused to be several statistics, it was already bad enough that I was a teenage mother! I couldn’t be a teen mother and a drop out, that’s a negative! Having you at a young age changed my life entirely! I had to grow up real quick! Shout out to your dad, Damen Gadson for being there from the moment you were born and being that great example of what a man is supposed to be! 

Over these 21 years we have been through so much, from you being snag-a-tooth for 3 years; to you bussing your head open and getting 6 staples; being taken to the police station from having a fake gun in front of the house at 8; you breaking your arm; you getting suspended from school damn near every year; breaking your toe; me being your biggest fan on the bball court and the football field; getting expelled and sent to an alternative school; and lastly going to summer school so you can graduate! BUT BY THE GRACE OF GOD WE MADE IT! Thank you Jesus!!! I always say, I’m glad that you were bad when you were younger!  I am so proud of the man you have become, working and trying to find your way in this world! With NO KIDS! πŸ™ŒπŸ™Œ Now you talking about going to college, that makes me soo happy! Hopefully, when you get back in school you will find your way back to the bball court, because you get your shot from your moms j/k that would be Ga Ga!  Son, keep grinding and making me proud and don’t forget your younger brother and sister are watching you! We πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ you! Now don’t turn up tooo much! 

Your Mama,


One thought on ““TO MY FIRST HEARTBEAT”

  1. Tears, Tears and more Tears are flowing. You did not leave out anything. I thought that I had enough fear in you so that this did not happen to my child however, when a child decides to make a choice good, bad or just doing what they choose to do the end result may
    change there life. I’m a living witness that God does what he wants to do in his own time.
    That little guy was the highlight of our lives. Now he’s all grown up and starting to make the right decisions. GaGa and his uncle Robert and his uncle Sherman helped me get past teeanage pregnancy because I was a basket case. Graduated from highschool, Associates Degree, Bachelor Degree, Master Degree and Ph’d in progress after having a child at 18. Now we are all GRACE CASES.

    I surely hope and pray that DeMarcus will read your post and perceive it in a way that it will make him a better person everyday. Love Proud Mother and Grandmother.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s