Ladies! Ladies! Ladies! Why are we always asking ourselves this question more often than not “Should I leave or should I stay?” Nine times out of Ten we already know in the heart of hearts what the answer is before we even ask it. However, often we think we can change him, thinks it will get better, and sometimes blame ourselves. All the while, we stay and place ourselves in damaging situations, instead of putting our big girl panties on and walking away.
If your relationship lacks true commitment, communication and compromise; it maybe time to re-evaluate the situation. If he can’t fully commit to you, your families future and make sure all of your needs are met and you know you have tried everything under the sun to get him to fully commit ! You’ve done it all and nothing but a sorry, I am not ready for that yet from him and then you decide to leave! That’s not giving up that’s getting tired, honey!
The lack of communication in a relationship is often the biggest sign missed by us, ladies. Why? Because we always tend to make up excuses instead of facing the reality. Girl, that’s just how he talks to me! You don’t know him like I know him! EXCUSES!! He doesn’t call you he just text you! He be too busy to talk! BS!!! You’ve told him on several occasions how it hurts your feeling or how you felt disrespected and he brushed it off!? You do know that listening is apart of communication, right? Not listening is problem because they will never understand your side!
I’m here to tell you that unless the both of you try to communicate better, it only gets worse! You can allow it to make you feel like you are giving up if you want to and that’s on you; however after awhile you will get tired of being disrespected, disregarded, cussed out and ignored! One day, when you get tired I guess.
Compromise??? WHETT? What is that? Nobody these days wants to compromise! Everybody has the “it’s my way or the highway” mentality. Ladies, let’s be honest, we comprise the most to try to keep the peace? Now, I’m not saying that we don’t get an attitude for a couple of days but we also know that we can’t stay mad for too long, and we fold. Often without getting any results that may have caused the rift in the first place??? Right?? Yeah, I know. I’m guilty of it too! That doesn’t make it right or healthy for that matter. Why? For two reasons: 1) he knows you will ALWAYS fold and take your words as idle threats; and 2) you will NEVER get your part of the bargain because you didn’t have enough backdone to stand firm.
Now don’t get me wrong, ladies! I am not saying do not ever compromise; but what I am saying is you got to know when to hold em and know when to fold em. We often compromise ourselves right into a doormat for him and they keep walking all of us; until we get tired of washing the footprints off of our back! Think about it!
Now Ladies, if we are asking ourselves this question, then there are some obvious “Red Flags or Warning Signs” that we have ignored from the jump or thought it was cute at some point. One thing I know is nobody can tell you when it’s time, you just know. My mama used to tell me when I was going all the time “only you will know when you get tired.”